LOS ANGELES — Thanks to the Rockettes and their Easter extravaganza hogging the stage at Radio City Music Hall, there’s still a week still to go before the large human fashion and accessory show known as the 2014 NFL Draft. I don’t know about you, but the build-up has been exhausting. How many more times do we need to hear Jadeveon Clowney doesn’t work hard, or Johnny Manziel is too small and reckless to play quarterback in the league, or Blake Bortles’s girlfriend is really hot? Exactly. I’m tired just typing those words out.
So, before any of these future millionaire hits the red carpet, bear hugs the Commissioner and says unintelligible things to Deion Sanders, we here at The Chris Brockman Website (meaning, me) decided it would be fun to look at back at the last 10 years of the 1st Round of the NFL Draft (2004-2013) and, with the benefit of incredible George Costanza spotting squirrels and dimes hindsight, pick the best pick selection of the last 10 years at each slot, whom we’ve titled “Rock Star,” along with two Honorable Mentions – because for some selections there are multiple options – and who ended up being the worst at each draft slot, whom we’ve suggestively titled, “Burger Flipper.” It was that or “Freight Driver” or “Middle School Gym Teacher.”
Hope this holds you over for the next few days before the real fun. Enjoy. Send me nasty messages on Twitter telling me I got it wrong, but remember, you all have the same number of career sacks as Vernon Gholston.
1.) ROCK STAR: ANDREW LUCK, QB, Indianapolis Colts (2012) — When you’re 22-10 in two years with a nearly 2:1 touchdown to interception ratio, throw in 600-plus rushing yards and nine touchdowns, yeah, you’re a rock star. And you don’t think the Giants could’ve won those two Super Bowls with Luck?
Honorable Mention: Eli Manning (2004), Cam Newton (2011)
BURGER FLIPPER: JAMARCUS RUSSELL, QB Oakland Raiders (2007) — Sure, he’s the most infamous of the recent top picks, but in everyone’s defense, Russell was bad. Seven wins, 52-percent completion percentage and only 18 touchdowns in three seasons, and he weighed more than his left tackle.
2.) ROCK STAR: CALVIN JOHNSON, WR, Detroit Lions (2007) — If you need to know why Megatron is the best 2nd pick of the last decade just put on the tape from 2013’s Cowboys game in which he had 14 catches for 329 yards and a touchdown and get back to me. Throw in his four Pro Bowls and three All-Pro Team selections and he’s headed for a Hall of Fame career.
Honorable Mention: Ndamukong Suh (2010), Von Miller (2011)
BURGER FLIPPER: JASON SMITH, T, St. Louis Rams (2009) — Linemen selected with the second overall pick should start more than 26 games in four seasons. Even Robert Gallery made it eight years and started 103 games in that span.
3.) ROCK STAR: LARRY FITZGERALD, WR, Arizona Cardinals (2004) — Eight Pro Bowls, six seasons of over 1,000 yards receiving despite playing with JV quarterbacks most of his career, and some of the best hair in the NFL lock this down for Fitz. His 64-yard touchdown in Super Bowl XLVIII should’ve won the game if not for a crazy Steelers comeback, too.
Honorable Mention: Matt Ryan (2008), Joe Thomas (2007)
BURGER FLIPPER: TYSON JACKSON, DE, Kansas City Chiefs (2009) — Pass rushers are key but with only nine career sacks in five seasons, despite 55 starts isn’t going to cut it. Plus, it’s a tad too early to announce Marcel Dareus, Dion Jordan or even Trent Richardson busts.
4.) ROCK STAR: PHILIP RIVERS, QB, San Diego Chargers (2004) — Mr. Bolo Tie has been one of the grittiest quarterbacks in the league during his tenure, earning five Pro-Bowl selections, 79 wins as a starter, and 221 touchdown passes despite his awkward throwing style and fashion choices. Tough, hard-nosed and always willing to do whatever it takes for his team, Rivers is the undeniable face of the Chargers.
Honorable Mention: D’Brickashaw Ferguson (2006), A.J. Green (2011)
BURGER FLIPPER: AARON CURRY, LB, Seattle Seahawks (2009) — Curry registered just 5.5 sacks in his first two seasons and zero in his third full year. And the hammer of his argument: he couldn’t even bust into the Raiders roster in 2012.
5.) ROCK STAR: PATRICK PETERSON, CB, Arizona Cardinals (2011) — In just three short seasons Peterson is already one of the most explosive and dynamic defensive players in all of football. Throw in his return-game versatility (he even played a little offense in 2013) and it’s easy to see why he’s in this position. Cam Newton went first overall in 2011, but Peterson was, in my mind, the best player in that Draft.
Honorable Mention: Eric Berry (2010), Sean Taylor (2004)
BURGER FLIPPER: GLENN DORSEY, DT, Kansas City Chiefs (2008) — Remember the hype on Dorsey coming into the 2008 Draft? I’m sure we all expected more than six sacks in 78 career starts.
6.) ROCK STAR: VERNON DAVIS, TE, San Francisco 49ers (2006) — Davis entered the league with the body of an Adonis, and the hype to match, and he’s done nothing but live up to the immense expectations. Feared, explosive, Davis is a two-time Pro Bowler and scored 13 touchdowns two separate times in his eight-year career.
Honorable Mention: Julio Jones (2011), Kellen Winslow II (2004)
BURGER FLIPPER: VERNON GHOLSTON, DE, New York Jets (2008) — Probably the most famous defensive busts of the last decade, Gholston infamously registered a whopping zero career sacks during his three seasons with the Jets.
7.) ROCK STAR: ADRIAN PETERSON, RB, Minnesota Vikings (2007) — A body chiseled from stone, the most violent runner since Jim Brown, and eight yards from breaking the all-time, single-season rushing record make AD a rock star. Not to mention him topping 1,250 yards rushing in six of his seven seasons, to go along with three All-Pro selections.
Honorable Mention: Joe Haden (2010), Aldon Smith (2011)
BURGER FLIPPER: TROY WILLIAMSON, WR, Minnesota Vikings (2005) — Williamson played just one full season in his five NFL years and registered only 37 catches in it. He finished with four career touchdowns.
8.) ROCK STAR: DEANGELO HALL, CB, Atlanta Falcons (2004) — Say what you will about Hall, and plenty have, including himself, he’s produced in all three of his NFL stops. His 43 career interceptions ranks him fifth among active players; his mouth puts him first.
Honorable Mention: Antrel Rolle (2005), Eugene Monroe (2009)
BURGER FLIPPER: DERRICK HARVEY, DE, Jacksonville Jaguars (2008) — Harvey played just three full seasons, garnering eight sacks and never lived up to the lofty expectations which surrounded him on draft day.
9.) ROCK STAR: LUKE KUECHLY, LB, Carolina Panthers (2012) — Only two years into the league, Kuechly is a bonafide rock star at the linebacker position. He has 200 tackles in two seasons and was AP Defensive Rookie of the Year and then AP Defensive Player of the Year in just his second season.
Honorable Mention: Carlos Rogers (2005), B.J. Raji (2009)
BURGER FLIPPER: DEE MILLINER, CB, New York Jets (2013) — It may be early to declare Milliner a bust, but when you’re declared the next island inhabitant, anything less is falling coconuts.
10.) ROCK STAR: JEROD MAYO, LB, New England Patriots (2008) — A two-time Pro Bowler and once All-Pro selection, Mayo is the unquestioned leader of a consistently stout Patriots defense. His presence was clearly missed after going down in Week 6 and missing the rest of 2013.
Honorable Mention: Michael Crabtree (2009), Dunta Robinson (2004)
BURGER FLIPPER: BLAINE GABBERT, QB, Jacksonville Jaguars (2011) — Can you believe that before the 2011 Draft there was talk of Gabbert going first overall? This was a real discussion. Gabbert is 5-22 as a starter with just a 53.3 completion percentage. Great hair, though.
11.) ROCK STAR: BEN ROETHLISBERGER, QB, Pittsburgh Steelers (2004) — This is far and away the most loaded of the 1st Round draft slots with four potential Hall of Famers (J.J. Watt was also an 11th overall pick). But when you play in a quarterback-driven league, and you’re a quarterback who’s won two Super Bowls (and played in another), you’re the Rock Star of this group, Mr. Roethlisberger.
Honorable Mention: DeMarcus Ware (2005), Patrick Willis (2007)
BURGER FLIPPER: AARON MAYBIN, DE, Buffalo Bills (2009) — Heralded as the next Bruce Smith when drafted, Maybin finished with six career sacks in four seasons. They all came in 2011.
12.) ROCK STAR: HALOTI NGATA, DT, Baltimore Ravens (2006) — Ngata has been the best defensive tackle in the game for several years now. Incredibly consistent and durable, he’s missed just five games in eight seasons, not to mention he’s a five-time Pro Bowler and two-time All-Pro pick.
Honorable Mention: Marshawn Lynch (2007), Ryan Clady (2008)
BURGER FLIPPER: CHRISTIAN PONDER, QB, Minnesota Vikings (2011) — Another quarterback bust from 2011, Ponder had moments of competence, but was never a first-round talent. He does have more touchdowns (38) than interceptions (34) which is more than some can say.
13.) ROCK STAR: BRIAN ORAKPO, LB, Washington Redskins (2009) — A three-time Pro Bowler, Orakpo missed nearly all of 2012 and bounced back with 10 sacks last season to push his career total to 39.5. A feared edge rusher, he’s among the game’s best when at full strength.
Honorable Mention: Jammal Brown (2005), Sheldon Richardson (2013)
BURGER FLIPPER: BRANDON GRAHAM, LB, Philadelphia Eagles (2010) — Philadelphia traded up to get the Michigan standout and it hasn’t exactly paid dividends. Graham has started just 12 games in four seasons and has registered 11.5 sacks.
14.) ROCK STAR: DARRELLE REVIS, CB, New York Jets (2007) — Fourteen is the draft slot for top defensive talent. Revis, a five-time Pro Bowler and three-time All-Pro, is widely considered the best cornerback of his generation, and renders half the field unusable whenever he’s 100-percent. His 21 career interceptions seem low, but when no one throws your way out of fear, it’s hard to pick anything off.
Honorable Mention: Earl Thomas (2010), Robert Quinn (2011)
BURGER FLIPPER: CHRIS WILLIAMS, T, Chicago Bears (2008) — Inconsistent in his seven-year career, Williams has only been able to log three full seasons
15.) ROCK STAR: DERRICK JOHNSON, LB, Kansas City Chiefs (2006) — Johnson has been as steady as they come in all nine of his NFL seasons with the Chiefs. A three-time Pro Bowler and once an All-Pro, he has 376 tackles in the last three years for a strong Kansas City defense.
Honorable Mention: Branden Albert (2008), Brian Cushing (2009)
BURGER FLIPPER: TYE HILL, CB, St. Louis Rams (2006) — Hill played only one full season (his first) in five years in the league and registered five career interceptions.
16.) ROCKSTAR: DOMINIQUE RODGERS-CROMARTIE, CB, Arizona Cardinals (2008) — Once a Pro-Bowler after a six-interception season with the Cardinals, DRC has been steady throughout his six NFL years. His 19 career picks and more than 100 pass breakups make him still one of the league’s top corners.
Honorable Mention: Ryan Kerrigan (2011), Shawn Andrews (2004)
BURGER FLIPPER: JUSTIN HARRELL, DT, Green Bay Packers (2007) — Harrell could never stay on the field for the Packers. He played in just 14 games in three seasons and missed all of 2009 with an injury.
17.) ROCK STAR: JOSH FREEMAN, QB, Tampa Bay Buccaneers (2009) — Before the wheels inexplicably fell off in 2013, Freeman was a big-time NFL quarterback with a 10-win and 4,000-yard season under his belt. He looked on his way to becoming one of the bright young stars in the league. We’ll see if he can regain that shine.
Honorable Mention: Chad Greenway (2006), Mike Iupati (2010)
BURGER FLIPPER: DAVID POLLACK, LB, Cincinnati Bengals (2005) — Pollack started just six of 16 games over two seasons and recorded four-and-a-half sacks before neck injury cut short his career.
18.) ROCK STAR: JOE FLACCO, QB, Baltimore Ravens (2008) — When you tell your owner, “nah, I’m good” on signing a crappy contract extension, then you go out and win the Super Bowl and sign a fresh $100 million deal, you’re a Rock Star. It also helps to be 28 games over .500 for your career as a starter and 9-4 in the playoffs.
Honorable Mention: Will Smith (2004), Leon Hall (2007)
BURGER FLIPPER: ERASMUS JAMES, DE, Minnesota Vikings (2005) — James played just one full season (his first) and had five sacks in four seasons, his career cut short by injury and an indefinite suspension by the league.
19.) ROCK STAR: ANTONIO CROMARTIE, CB, San Diego Chargers (2006) — Despite not knowing all his kids’ names, Cromartie has been a very good NFL corner, being named a Pro Bowler three times and once an All-Pro. His 28 career interceptions place him 10th on the active list.
Honorable Mention: Michael Griffin (2007), Jeremy Maclin (2009)
BURGER FLIPPER: JEFF OTAH, T, Carolina Panthers (2008) — After a successful rookie season in which he started 12 games, Otah caught the injury bug and started just 17 more in his short career. He missed all of 2010 due to injury.
20.) ROCK STAR: TAMBA HALI, DE, Kansas City Chiefs (2006) — A three-time Pro Bowler, Hali has missed only three games in eight seasons. Durable, reliable, and fearless, he’s sacked NFL quarterbacks 46.5 times in the last four years and is one of the game’s premier rushers.
Honorable Mention: Aqib Talib (2008), Kendall Wright (2012)
BURGER FLIPPER: KENECHI UDEZE, DE, Minnesota Vikings (2004) — I feel sorta terrible putting Udeze here since his career was cut short by leukemia, but he did have just 11 sacks in four seasons before his illness.
21.) ROCK STAR: VINCE WILFORK, DT, New England Patriots (2004) — The Heavy Chevy, Wilfork is what you call a run stopper, or a wide load, and has been among the best in the league at doing so during his 10-year career. A five-time Pro Bowler and once an All Pro, Wilfork’s value was seen last season when New England’s run defense was non-existent after his year-ending injury.
Honorable Mention: Alex Mack (2009), Reggie Nelson (2007)
BURGER FLIPPER: MATT JONES, WR, Jacksonville Jaguars (2005) — I swear this isn’t sour grapes because I wasted a high fantasy pick on Jones once upon a time. High hopes heading into the league, Jones started just 15 games in his four years and couldn’t escape substance-abuse problems.
22.) ROCK STAR: DEMARYIUS THOMAS, WR, Denver Broncos (2010) — Thomas exploded as an elite pass-catcher when Peyton Manning arrived in Denver. Two 90-plus catch, 1,400-plus yard seasons later, No. 88 is a two-time Pro Bowler and a feared NFL receiver who’s only getting better.
Honorable Mention: Percy Harvin (2009), Manny Lawson (2006)
BURGER FLIPPER: BRADY QUINN, QB, Cleveland Browns (2007) — The best looking of the Guys Waiting Too Long In The Draft Green Room club, Quinn is just 4-and-16 in his career as a starter and has better biceps than deep ball.
23.) ROCK STAR: DWAYNE BOWE, WR, Kansas City Chiefs (2007) — Despite never playing with a top-level quarterback, Bowe has put up solid numbers in his seven seasons (67/914/6 averages) and at times has shown he’s capable of being a premiere receiver.
Honorable Mention: Davin Joseph (2006), Michael Oher (2009)
BURGER FLIPPER: DANNY WATKINS, G, Philadelphia Eagles (2011) — Watkins, the Canadian firefighter, started 12 games his rookie season but has only started six in the last two.
24.) ROCK STAR: AARON RODGERS, QB, Green Bay Packers (2005) — Rodgers made fun of me for being bald at a post-awards show party (#Humblebrag) and he owned the place like a rock star. On the football field his credentials speak for themselves: Super Bowl winner, league MVP, three-time Pro Bowler, All Pro, 58 wins in six years as a starter, commercial pitchman.
Honorable Mention: Steven Jackson (2004), Dez Bryant (2010)
BURGER FLIPPER: PERIA JERRY, DT, Atlanta Falcons (2009) — Jerry started just 15 games in fours seasons and registered two sacks, before bouncing back in 2013 with 14 starts and three-and-a-half sacks.
25.) ROCK STAR: JON BEASON, LB, Carolina Panthers (2007) — Beason was a monster his first four seasons in the league with Carolina. He started all 64 games, averaged over 100 tackles per season and made three Pro Bowls and was named to the All-Pro team once. Injuries have cost him some of his productivity of late but he’s still a respectable player for the Giants.
Honorable Mention: Santonio Holmes (2006), Mike Jenkins (2008)
BURGER FLIPPER: AHMAD CARROLL, CB, Green Bay Packers (2004) — Carroll played well his first two years in the league, but ultimately has started just 28 games in five seasons with three career interceptions.
26.) ROCK STAR: CLAY MATTHEWS, LB, Green Bay Packers (2009) — Matthews has missed a handful of games in recent years but otherwise he’s been one of the most feared and consistent pass rushers in the NFL. A four-time Pro Bowler and an All Pro, Matthews has 50 career sacks in five seasons with Green Bay and has Hall of Fame pedigree.
Honorable Mention: Anthony Spencer (2007), Duane Brown (2008)
BURGER FLIPPER: JOHN MCCARGO, DT, Buffalo Bills (2006) — One career start in six seasons and only a couple of sacks, that’s rough for a first round pick, regardless of an injury-riddled career.
27.) ROCK STAR: RODDY WHITE, WR, Atlanta Falcons (2005) — White has been a stellar NFL receiver in his tenure. A five-time Pro Bowler and an All Pro, he had a streak of six consecutive 1,000-yard seasons and even led the league in receptions (115) in 2010.
Honorable Mention: Jason Babin (2004), DeAngelo Williams (2006)
BURGER FLIPPER: JIMMY SMITH, CB, Baltimore Ravens (2011) — It took Smith three seasons to become a starter in Baltimore but you want a first round corner to have more than four interceptions in three years.
28.) ROCK STAR: JOE STALEY, T, San Francisco 49ers (2007) — Staley has started all 98 games he’s played in his seven-year career, including every game the last three seasons. A three-time Pro Bowler, he’s the protector of Colin Kaepernick’s blind side.
Honorable Mention: Chris Gamble (2004), Marcedes Lewis (2006)
BURGER FLIPPER: LAWRENCE JACKSON, DE, Seattle Seahawks (2008) — An inconsistent starter in Seattle, Jackson was a solid sub for three seasons with the Lions before flaming out with 19 career sacks.
29.) ROCK STAR: NICK MANGOLD, C, New York Jets (2006) — No center in the last decade has been as durable and dependable as Mangold. He’s started all 126 games in his eight seasons and is a five-time Pro Bowler and two-time All Pro, and also is the owner of one of the league’s best beards.
Honorable Mention: Hakeem Nicks (2009), Ben Grubbs (2007)
BURGER FLIPPER: KENTWAN BALMER, DT, San Francisco 49ers (2008) — When you fail to record a sack and only start 11 games in five seasons, you should probably flip burgers.
30.) ROCK STAR: HEATH MILLER, TE, Pittsburgh Steelers (2005) — A steady head at the tight end position, Miller, a two-time Pro Bowler, has been Ben Roethlisberger’s safety valve for years. He’s averaged more than 50 catches and 4 touchdowns a season over his nine years.
Honorable Mention: Muhammed Wilkerson (2011), Joseph Addai (2006)
BURGER FLIPPER: A.J. JENKINS, WR, San Francisco 49ers (2012) — Jenkins has played in 19 games and has eight career receptions. Me, too.
31.) ROCK STAR: GREG OLSEN, TE, Chicago Bears (2007) — Olsen is as sure-handed as you’ll find at the tight end position and has been/is a big target for Jay Cutler and Cam Newton. He’s averaged 55 catches and five touchdowns a year in his seven seasons.
Honorable Mention: Doug Martin (2012), Mike Patterson (2005)
BURGER FLIPPER: RASHAUN WOODS, WR, San Francisco 49ers (2004) — Played in 14 games his rookie season garnering only seven receptions for 160 yards and a touchdown and then was never heard from again. Seriously, he disappeared. If you know where he is, let me know.
32.) ROCK STAR: LOGAN MANKINS, G, New England Patriots (2005) — One of the premiere guards in the league, Mankins has been the Patriots most stable lineman. He’s started 130 games in nine seasons and is a six-time Pro Bowler and once an All Pro.
Honorable Mention: Mathias Kiwanuka (2006), Benjamin Watson (2004)
BURGER FLIPPER: DEREK SHERROD, T, Green Bay Packers (2011) — Drafted to protect Aaron Rodgers, Sherrod has played in only 12 games in two years (zero starts) and missed all of 2012 with an injury.